A crush on your doctor

I'm just wondering - how many people have developed a crush/fallen in love with their doctor?

How did you handle it, do you still see the doctor?

If you have a serious crush

If you have a serious crush on the doctor and there is a chance that he could want you for something other than a patient - then YOU need to do him a huge favour and find another doctor RIGHT AWAY. It's the loving thing to do.

Most doctors have huge egos

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.
To quote a line from West Side Story: "Get rid of him and find another." Preferably one who'd have to overdose on Viagra.

When I was young, my family

When I was young, my family doctor did remind me of the Man from Glad. I did like the Man from Glad....

But everyone liked the Man from Glad - right? Puzzled

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYkm7ts62VM

Although he was an excellent doctor, I didn't feel comfortable with having the Man from Glad as my doctor - and so I switched.

Either get rid of the crush

Either get rid of the crush or get rid of the doctor ~ pronto!!! Don't entertain the thought for even a minute. Been there, done that, been hurt, badly.

USAF_nurse wrote: Most

USAF_nurse wrote:

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.
To quote a line from West Side Story: "Get rid of him and find another." Preferably one who'd have to overdose on Viagra.

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

chrisaldridge wrote: This is

chrisaldridge wrote:

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

Jawdropping! I love microwave popcorn. Cool

Chris - Posters would probably like to know what a doctor thinks. What would you want a patient to do if he or she had a crush on you?

(I hope that my grammar is o.k.) Smiling

No doctor in his right mind

No doctor in his right mind would ever start a relationship with anyone who had ever been their patient, unless maybe he delivered them as a baby and now they are in their 20s or something (I know, I know, but it's happened). So technically their mother was the patient not them.

The dangers involved for the doctor are just too great, and hell hath no fury...

Now, some doctors are not in their right mind when it comes to matters of the heart (no, I'm not talking about you, you know who you are), so it does happen, but more often than not it comes back to bite them in the a$$ and I don't mean in a way that they enjoy.

I've had some patients that I would have dated in a heartbeat if I had met them non-professionally and I remember one who made it VERY clear that she wanted that, but luckily my brain won that battle. She hasn't been my patient for a couple of years now (problem resolved, so didn't need to be anymore), but I still bite my lower lip and take a deep breath when I think about her, LOL.

Yes, we are actually human, sometimes. The difference is that if we are being smart about it, we don't ACT on it.

My favorite (sarcasm) is the battling spouses where the wife tries to flirt with me during the appointment just to bug the husband. Those appointments are SUCH fun (again, sarcasm).

wishandaprayer

wishandaprayer wrote:
chrisaldridge wrote:

most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

Jawdropping! I love microwave popcorn. Cool

2 out of 3 ain't bad, eh wisher?

wishandaprayer wrote: Chris -

wishandaprayer wrote:

Chris - Posters would probably like to know what a doctor thinks. What would you want a patient to do if he or she had a crush on you?

Honesty about it is nice, but I'd never act on it.

My best line when a patient tells me that (female) is:

I'm flattered, do you have an identical twin sister who shares your impeccable taste in men and is NOT my patient?

No? Awwww darn!!

chrisaldridge wrote: This is

chrisaldridge wrote:

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

I hate popcorn. I can be a crazy bitch when I want to, and if my grammar disturbs you, educate me. Are you always this charming or do you save it for Fridays?

USAF_nurse wrote: Most

USAF_nurse wrote:

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.

Yet another example of no matter how little men understand women, women understand men even less.

Here's a hint: The male ego is very different from the female ego. You are describing the reaction of a prom queen, not a male doctor.

island-doc wrote: Yet another

island-doc wrote:

Yet another example of no matter how little men understand women, women understand men even less.

Here's a hint: The male ego is very different from the female ego. You are describing the reaction of a prom queen, not a male doctor.

I derailed this thread so I will set it right. Chris Aldridge said I generalized and he was right. You said that women don't understand men and you're also right. I don't understand men! I like them though. Sorry about the grammar.

chrisaldridge

chrisaldridge wrote:
USAF_nurse wrote:

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.
To quote a line from West Side Story: "Get rid of him and find another." Preferably one who'd have to overdose on Viagra.

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

No holds barred eh Chris? hahaha

Daenerys

Daenerys wrote:
chrisaldridge wrote:
USAF_nurse wrote:

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.
To quote a line from West Side Story: "Get rid of him and find another." Preferably one who'd have to overdose on Viagra.

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

No holds barred eh Chris? hahaha

Oh, I don't know about that...

I could have gone a lot further with it, so he was probably holding back a lot.

Most of those patients are

Most of those patients are moved to Arrow psychiatric ward now!

If you have a crush on your

If you have a crush on your doctor, you need to get over it. It's unhealthy for you, because it can never be. If you can't get over it, you need to find a new doctor.

You've probably had other unrequited crushes in your life. You were able to live without those men.

I know this sounds harsh, but no good can come of this crush.

I'm sorry.

island-doc wrote: I've had

island-doc wrote:

I've had some patients that I would have dated in a heartbeat if I had met them non-professionally and I remember one who made it VERY clear that she wanted that, but luckily my brain won that battle. She hasn't been my patient for a couple of years now (problem resolved, so didn't need to be anymore), but I still bite my lower lip and take a deep breath when I think about her, LOL.

What does that nasty CMPA lawyer have to say about this?
Is there a statute of limitations? Puzzled

Daenerys

Daenerys wrote:
chrisaldridge wrote:
USAF_nurse wrote:

Most doctors have huge egos so what another male would recognize as "She wants me, yeah, she wants me," to a doctor it comes across as "YES! another patient who thinks her doctor is like Tony the Tiger...GREAT!!! This only lasts until someone points him to the truth and when that happens you get a form letter advising you to seek another doctor.
To quote a line from West Side Story: "Get rid of him and find another." Preferably one who'd have to overdose on Viagra.

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

No holds barred eh Chris? hahaha

He didn't say popchips you silly girl! Smiling

island-doc wrote: 2 out of 3

island-doc wrote:

2 out of 3 ain't bad, eh wisher?

Tell your CMPA lawyer that Wisher told you to call; maybe if you got more loving you'd be less miserable. Puzzled Sticking out tongue

.

This was fun to read: Sri

This was fun to read: Sri might find some more helpful advice. Eye-wink

http://www.erlove.com/er_stories/dating_patients.php

Hi Sri This post is just for

Hi Sri
This post is just for you. I tried to make a joke out of something that to you is very painful. I've always been abysmal at jokes and this time my attempt at one hurt you and infuriated others. I have written to RateMDs John and asked him to remove my original post. I've seen enough pain and the thought of hurting another person with meaningless words is repulsive to me. Next time I won't be too hasty to put in my two cents. I am sorry for hurting and offending you. Please accept my apology.
Three people have given you sound advice. wishandprayer, rockygirl and willowwhite. Do what you think is right for you.

I think that your post was

I think that your post was lighthearted fun. Just like my Man from Glad post.

But what you failed to see - is that the doctor could need viagra and she might not care. She might really love him.

If that's the case - then the best thing that I think that she could do is be honest with him - tell him why she is leaving. You just never know what might happen.

wishandaprayer

wishandaprayer wrote:
island-doc wrote:

I've had some patients that I would have dated in a heartbeat if I had met them non-professionally and I remember one who made it VERY clear that she wanted that, but luckily my brain won that battle. She hasn't been my patient for a couple of years now (problem resolved, so didn't need to be anymore), but I still bite my lower lip and take a deep breath when I think about her, LOL.

What does that nasty CMPA lawyer have to say about this?
Is there a statute of limitations? Puzzled

For what?

There's no rule against wishing that you COULD date a patient, just one against doing it.

Of course, given that I'm not entirely single at the moment... but I don't think the CMPA would help me out with that one.

USAF_nurse

USAF_nurse wrote:
chrisaldridge wrote:

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

I hate popcorn. I can be a crazy bitch when I want to, and if my grammar disturbs you, educate me. Are you always this charming or do you save it for Fridays?

Welcome to Crazytown, population: you.

chrisaldridge

chrisaldridge wrote:
USAF_nurse wrote:
chrisaldridge wrote:

This is an insane generalization, much like saying most nurses are crazy bitches with a predisposition to poor grammar and microwave popcorn.

I hate popcorn. I can be a crazy bitch when I want to, and if my grammar disturbs you, educate me. Are you always this charming or do you save it for Fridays?

Welcome to Crazytown, population: you.

Big smile He is charming, isn't he? Puzzled

I think he's visited Crazytown himself many times. But not to worry, I've had some good times, and some bad times there myself. Smiling Eye-wink

What am I not getting here?

What am I not getting here? A woman with a serious problem posts here, looking for advice, and the thread gets filled by people taking jabs at each other.

Sri: "I'm just wondering -

Sri: "I'm just wondering - how many people have developed a crush/fallen in love with their doctor?

How did you handle it, do you still see the doctor?"

I think that developing a crush or falling in love can be a natural reaction, especially if you have been very sick and the doctor helps you to get better.
I know it happened to me. I daydreamed about him for quite a while. lol I even told my husband that I loved him (the doctor).
It's natural. It happens. It is probably WHY there are regulations governing doctors' actions regarding patient relationships.

I'm sorry folks, I should

I'm sorry folks, I should have made it clear - I'm a man in love with my female doctor.
Thanks for all your advice, I know it applies..

Sri wrote: I'm sorry folks, I

Sri wrote:

I'm sorry folks, I should have made it clear - I'm a man in love with my female doctor.
Thanks for all your advice, I know it applies..

So I guess the prom-queen analogy may apply as well after all, LOL

Yeah, you're probably right,

Yeah, you're probably right, island-doc

lol

You're right, Daenerys - it's

You're right, Daenerys - it's natural reaction which I know happens quite a bit.
One of my friends' (who I trust immensly) just emailed me - she said the same thing & it's normal. She said I should continue to see her, since she's a good doctor & she doesn't seem to have a problem with it. Which I agree with, if it REALLY bothered her, I'm sure she'd say something.

No worries, USAF-nurse

No worries, USAF-nurse Smiling

Sri wrote: You're right,

Sri wrote:

You're right, Daenerys - it's natural reaction which I know happens quite a bit.
One of my friends' (who I trust immensly) just emailed me - she said the same thing & it's normal. She said I should continue to see her, since she's a good doctor & she doesn't seem to have a problem with it. Which I agree with, if it REALLY bothered her, I'm sure she'd say something.

Hell hath no fury like a woman spurned, but guys are used to it happening regularly so they just shrug it off and don't kick up too much fuss, usually.

The only college complaint that I have ever heard of involving sexual behaviour and a male patient involved a gay male urologist.

Isn't it odd that so many women prefer a female gynecologist but you don't see that many men complaining that they can only find a female urologist? *shrug*

Daenerys wrote: Sri: "I'm

Daenerys wrote:

Sri: "I'm just wondering - how many people have developed a crush/fallen in love with their doctor?

How did you handle it, do you still see the doctor?"

I think that developing a crush or falling in love can be a natural reaction, especially if you have been very sick and the doctor helps you to get better.
I know it happened to me. I daydreamed about him for quite a while. lol I even told my husband that I loved him (the doctor).
It's natural. It happens. It is probably WHY there are regulations governing doctors' actions regarding patient relationships.

Hi D

I agree--I always have a special feeling for the good doctors (especially the handsome, charming ones) who help me & family. I guess it could be called a mild crush. Nothing that I would ever act on especially at my age. Sexuality aside, I do feel great affection for my dentist of 30 yrs. & my family doc of several yrs.also gyno of 20+ yrs. feels like they're a sweet cousin--& I believe they feel real affection for me & my family. When our family doc ( for us and all of husband's family) of 30 yrs died of cancer we all mourned & we still miss his warmth & kindness.

When Mama (89 soon) was last hospitalized she liked the hospitalist a lot. He was a really sweet cute guy probably 40ish. She told him he was the best doctor she had seen and also the most handsome--in fact she told him several times. It was a real kick to see him blush & smile. I think he really got a good feeling from her little flirt with him.
Wanda

impatientpatien

impatientpatien wrote:
Daenerys wrote:

Sri: "I'm just wondering - how many people have developed a crush/fallen in love with their doctor?

How did you handle it, do you still see the doctor?"

I think that developing a crush or falling in love can be a natural reaction, especially if you have been very sick and the doctor helps you to get better.
I know it happened to me. I daydreamed about him for quite a while. lol I even told my husband that I loved him (the doctor).
It's natural. It happens. It is probably WHY there are regulations governing doctors' actions regarding patient relationships.

Hi D

I agree--I always have a special feeling for the good doctors (especially the handsome, charming ones) who help me & family. I guess it could be called a mild crush. Nothing that I would ever act on especially at my age. Sexuality aside, I do feel great affection for my dentist of 30 yrs. & my family doc of several yrs.also gyno of 20+ yrs. feels like they're a sweet cousin--& I believe they feel real affection for me & my family. When our family doc ( for us and all of husband's family) of 30 yrs died of cancer we all mourned & we still miss his warmth & kindness.

When Mama (89 soon) was last hospitalized she liked the hospitalist a lot. He was a really sweet cute guy probably 40ish. She told him he was the best doctor she had seen and also the most handsome--in fact she told him several times. It was a real kick to see him blush & smile. I think he really got a good feeling from her little flirt with him.
Wanda

That's so cute Wanda. I like Mama!!

impatientpatien wrote: When

impatientpatien wrote:

When Mama (89 soon) was last hospitalized she liked the hospitalist a lot. He was a really sweet cute guy probably 40ish. She told him he was the best doctor she had seen and also the most handsome--in fact she told him several times. It was a real kick to see him blush & smile. I think he really got a good feeling from her little flirt with him.
Wanda

When my grandma (almost 88) broke her toe last spring, after her young and very good looking ER resident left she told my mom "I think I'll keep him", lol. I ended up seeing the same resident a couple of months later and yeah, he was really hot, very sweet as well. Had I met him under different circumstances I would have totally gone out with him.

I decided one of my doctors

I decided one of my doctors has been starving for compliments.

Last year, in an inadvertent and sort of bumbling way, I managed to push the right buttons with him. Ever since, he has shown his charming side. The handsome part is there in abundance, I must say.

I'm single, and although I have no intention of creating any problems for him, I do the subtle flirting thing. I am very careful of what I say since 85% of the time, a tech is in the room with us.

It seems to be working. Heck, on my last routine visit, he waived the charges for my visit. Nice! Our insurance out-of-pocket costs had recently gone up, and that saved me a co-payment.

sunrise2010 wrote: I decided

sunrise2010 wrote:

I decided one of my doctors has been starving for compliments.

Last year, in an inadvertent and sort of bumbling way, I managed to push the right buttons with him. Ever since, he has shown his charming side. The handsome part is there in abundance, I must say.

I'm single, and although I have no intention of creating any problems for him, I do the subtle flirting thing. I am very careful of what I say since 85% of the time, a tech is in the room with us.

It seems to be working. Heck, on my last routine visit, he waived the charges for my visit. Nice! Our insurance out-of-pocket costs had recently gone up, and that saved me a co-payment.

My you must be proud.

Not really proud. But

Not really proud. But considering the financial difficulties that seemed to be looming over me in the last month, it was kind of a relief to get a break.

island-doc wrote: Of

island-doc wrote:

Of course, given that I'm not "entirely single"
at the moment...

LMAO, What the heck does that mean? LOL! Maybe we have a new buzz
phrase here...

sunrise2010 wrote: Not really

sunrise2010 wrote:

Not really proud. But considering the financial difficulties that seemed to be looming over me in the last month, it was kind of a relief to get a break.

While I can certainly appreciate the financial difficulties, try not to do that.
It can wreak havoc with your self-esteem. Smiling

Mairen8 wrote: island-doc

Mairen8 wrote:
island-doc wrote:

Of course, given that I'm not "entirely single"
at the moment...

LMAO, What the heck does that mean? LOL! Maybe we have a new buzz
phrase here...

It means that if I was to act on my attraction to any of my patients it wouldn't be the college that I'd be most worried about.

I'd have to learn to sleep with one eye open, or I'd get bobbitted

Mairen8 wrote: sunrise2010

Mairen8 wrote:
sunrise2010 wrote:

I decided one of my doctors has been starving for compliments.

Last year, in an inadvertent and sort of bumbling way, I managed to push the right buttons with him. Ever since, he has shown his charming side. The handsome part is there in abundance, I must say.

I'm single, and although I have no intention of creating any problems for him, I do the subtle flirting thing. I am very careful of what I say since 85% of the time, a tech is in the room with us.

It seems to be working. Heck, on my last routine visit, he waived the charges for my visit. Nice! Our insurance out-of-pocket costs had recently gone up, and that saved me a co-payment.

My you must be proud.

The world's oldest profession lives on.

Hmm... if I wear a low-cut tank top to my dentist's office, do you think he'll waive my bill too?

Or does it only work for women?

I didn't know it worked with

I didn't know it worked with doctors. I have found (accidentally, Marien, accidentally) that low cut tops work with auto mechanics. I didn't get anything off the bill, but the work was prioritized and got done quickly!

rockygirl wrote: I didn't

rockygirl wrote:

I didn't know it worked with doctors. I have found (accidentally, Marien, accidentally) that low cut tops work with auto mechanics. I didn't get anything off the bill, but the work was prioritized and got done quickly!

It works great with car salesmen too. I literally paid half the ticketed price for my car, including taxes/fees. Now everyone wants to take me as their "accessory" every time they are in the market for a new car.

island-doc wrote: It means

island-doc wrote:

It means that if I was to act on my attraction to any of my patients it wouldn't be the college that I'd be most worried about.

I'd have to learn to sleep with one eye open, or I'd get bobbitted

Hey! I live in that part of Virginia that really happened. Mrs. Lorena Bobbitt worked in a nail salon
in a nearby shopping center (like walking distance). The salon had to close their doors because
of all the gawkers that kept going by. It put a local hospital out in "hicksville" in the national media.
It was more notoriety than this small town could handle. Big smile

island-doc wrote: Hmm... if

island-doc wrote:

Hmm... if I wear a low-cut tank top to my dentist's office, do you think he'll waive my bill too?

Or does it only work for women?

It could work but keep one eye open and ensure that he is using the proper instruments. Smiling Eye-wink

Well, it seems that

Well, it seems that island-doc had a certain image in mind when he submitted his comments about my posts. For sure, it won't work in my case.

I am a fit woman in her late 50's, but with the bustline of a figure skater. Smiling
(keep moving along, nothing to see).

And, I will also say that my latest visit to my ophthalmologist was to discuss the possibility of a second cataract surgery. That's who the charming, winsome doctor is that I'm so taken with. Hope this helps you keep a perspective.

I believe this could work two ways. Because while my ophthalmologist, who does both Lasik and cataract surgery, is no doubt a licensed physician in a serious business, it's a very competitive branch of medicine that can appeal to patients' vanity, and not in a small way.

Frankly, the doctor has a certain appeal (not evident at first, but became so later). If he used half of his natural abilities, I'll bet he could have sold me a lot more quickly on the very expensive premium intraocular lens that I ended up buying out of my pocket. But I'm sure that he didn't want to do that, which probably speaks well of him. Perhaps it's best not to over-promise anything. He relegated this task of sales to his "refractive consultant", who did not do a very good job in laying out the options. I ended up agonizing over my decision, and took longer preparing for the first surgery than was probably necessary.

sunrise2010 wrote: I am a

sunrise2010 wrote:

I am a fit woman in her late 50's, but with the bustline of a figure skater. Smiling
(keep moving along, nothing to see).

And, I will also say that my latest visit to my ophthalmologist was to discuss the possibility of a second cataract surgery. That's who the charming, winsome doctor is that I'm so taken with. Hope this helps you keep a perspective.

Make sure that you really need that second cataract surgery. There are risks, and you must know that the risk is that you could lose your eye and have to wear a prosthesis.

Do the benefits outweigh the possible risks?

How bad is your vision? You can drive with vision in your best eye being 20/50 or better.

This reminds me of a dentist

This reminds me of a dentist I knew who slept with MANY of his patients, his patient's mothers (married or not), the wives of the other dentists in the office and his receptionists.

Seriously, we're talking the Rasputin of dentistry here.

Lucky he wasn't a doctor, I guess dentists don't have rules about that kind of thing.

Of course, constantly getting kicked out of shared practices by angry husbands must have had some financial toll on him over the years.

Thanks for the concern,

Thanks for the concern, Wisher.

I haven't made up my mind on this issue. My eye with the remaining cataract got considerably more myopic just in a matter of 5 months. One thing I've noticed is that there is no predictability to the deterioration of vision, and it doesn't always go on an upward curve.

I'm in the U.S., and in my state, the driver's license requirement is a visual acuity of 20/40.

I didn't mean to scare you -

I didn't mean to scare you - just to make you aware that there are risks. If it is bothering your vision wiht your two eyes, or you feel bad because your eye doesn't look good, then the benefits may outweigh the risks for you.

However, if you look normal now, and you can see o.k. with your two eyes together, I personally would not risk it, knowing everything that I know now.

Of course you are in the U.S. and perhaps an ophthalmologist has to treat you properly there. I don't know how it works in the States.

rockygirl wrote: "...I have

rockygirl wrote:

"...I have found (accidentally, Marien, accidentally) that low cut tops work with auto mechanics.

LOL, Rockygirl! This would work for many men, except I-Doc and his dentist, I suspect! Evil

island-doc wrote: Of course,

island-doc wrote:

Of course, constantly getting kicked out of shared practices by angry husbands must have had some financial toll on him over the years.

If getting kicked out of shared practices was his only consequence, he probably should have considered himself lucky.

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